What do Nervous Energy and a fracture have in common?
Nothing actually, apart form a fall and a fracture has allowed me the time, to actually physically stop, rest and be in my body a lot more. So much so that I am beginning to feel a lot of things I wasn't allowing myself to feel from being in constant fight or flight, drive, rush all the time living in constant low grade, well I would say medium anxiety all the time, living in nervous energy, constantly in anticipation of something bad is going to happen.
Currently I have no idea when or how living in nervous energy started, I could keep going back and looking into how and when, but for me it's more important to focus on the here and now and being more in my body. Slowing down. not rushing, feeling the nervous energy, the anxiety, not indulging in it, but being aware of it, working on coming back to my body when I feel it with things that help me, such a walking, being in nature , having a cosy bath with candles, breathing, yes sometimes it feels like I take a breath in the morning, hold my breath the entire day and don't breath out again till I'm home in bed at night, so being aware of my breath, exercise, even doing housework, southing physical to bring me back to my body.
This is just the beginning for me, as actually my stop by falling, which came about form the lack of presence I was in, was actually a blessing to let me stop, and feel a lot of things, I can either keep going, or use this as the blessing that has been offered to reconfigure things, my thoughts, movements, letting go of anxiety and nervous energy. It won't happen over night, but it will be an amazing journey to let this all go. A really practical living one which I'll come back to, to write about, share things that helped and supported me to let it all go completely.
The most important thing I feel, always, no matter what it is, is to be honest with yourself, to actually say without making it a big drama or woe, just being really honest I use nervous energy, I run on nervous energy - whatever works for you, but actually admitting that to yourself brings a real honesty and lets you feel your body, where you are at, a lot more. That for me is the most important key.
Some of things I already use alongside the above is Esoteric Yoga, ( there is a great 15 min free audio here for Esoteric Yoga to support sleep https://soundcloud.com/vicky-geary/body-awareness-for-sleep) I love these classes, which I can do in my bed - they really help and support me to come back to my body. I also listen to music around the house that is soothing and supportive for my body such as Ancient Sands, The Call or Moments by Chris James (https://chrisjames.net/store/), or going for a massage at the local wellbeing clinic, be it a sports massages, chiropractor treatment, anything that I can get around me that supports me medically.
Talking to people, expressing how I feel is great too, and slowing down when I speak, I can then feel more clearly in my body when I slow down if things are true for me or not too, which is an added bonus, Using aromatherapy around the house, we have a couple of diffusers which are great, just add water, a few drops of oil and they diffuse out a gentle sent for however long you want. Also the foods I eat, I don't have caffeine or alcohol in my diet, but there are other foods that race you too, sugar, hidden sugars, stimulants so they are once to watch out for, and even conversations that want to try and hook me in, stimulate me.
I think another thing is putting myself first, taking care of my own heath and wellbeing before others, that's not something we are taught to do, it's almost like we are told growing up everyone else is more important than you, so we self negate. We grow up being polite and nice, whilst totally going against what we feel to do.
We all know how fight and flight affects our body, there is so much medical evidence out there, it can make us exhausted, burn out, have adrenal fatigue, age the inside of our bodies quicker than we want them too, I'm sure it affects works, relationships, lots of things too, not just how we feel in our body, For me I amn't looking for a solution to best manage it, but actually live in a way that heals it for good. Which I know is absolutely possible, and it doesn't mean I have to go sit in a cave and meditate.
But the biggest thing is not fighting my awarenesses, living it fully, and not reacting to people.
Anyway, this is a learning journey for me, one I'm keen to take, and master :-) so lets' see where it takes me and I know I can heal from it already, just like we all can. No matter what it is in life we are going through.
We all have the ability to heal everything, no matter how hard we think it may be, or think we can't - we can.